'I just count money, that’s all I do': the sporting quotes of 2018

From Australia’s sandpaper storm to some impressive popularity contests, via José Mourinho and worm denial

Tom Bryant

 @TomBry

Mon 31 Dec 2018 10.30 GMTLast modified on Sun 6 Jan 2019 11.39 GMT

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5 January: “We have money for sardines and I’m thinking lobster. I will do my best to try and bring in the best players. I will look to the lobsters and sea bass, but if not we must buy sardines. But sometimes the sardines can win games” – Perhaps, Carlos Carvalhal, but they couldn’t keep Swansea in the Premier League.

19 January: “I didn’t actually eat the worms. It was a bit of banter where you get a nice, big juicy worm hanging out the edge of your mouth as if you’re chewing it. Of course the worm comes out and you wash your mouth out with water” – Burnley’s Sean Dyche is forced to deny, er, going to groundwhile a player at Bristol City.

22 February: “It could have been worse as the cow ran at him for a second time but he managed to get out of the way” – Queen of the South assistant manager Dougi

23 March: “Dear Los Angeles, You’re Welcome” – a full-page ad taken out by Zlatan Ibrahimovic in the LA Times as he signs for the Galaxy.

19 April: “Piss off. Eleven!” – Sam Allardyce marks himself out of 10 after Everton sent out a survey to fans asking them to do the same of the club’s then manager.

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